Electrolyzer vs. Rancor vs. Pohatu vs. Craniac

''Amset-Ra, Invizable, and Tee-Vee walk up to the front door of Jabba's Palace. Amset-Ra knocks on the door, and the security droid pops out of the door and accidentally hits Amset-Ra in the face.''

Amset-Ra: Ow! Watch it!

Invizable: Good thing I don't have a face to get hit.

Amset-Ra: But you do have your glasses.

Security Droid: What do you want here at Jabba's Palace?

Amset-Ra: We would like to stage a battle at the-

Security Droid: Hold it. I recognize you as Amset-Ra from Amset-Ra's Fighting Pyramid. You've had two matches on this planet so far.

Amset-Ra: Three if you count Alien vs. Lord Garmadon from last season, which was held in Mos Eisley Cantina.

Security Droid: Whatever. Anyway, you may enter.

The door opens, and everyone troops inside.

Invizable: Ooh, I don't feel so well. I gotta lay down. Invizable leaves.

Amset-Ra: Well, we'll need a new announcer. Ogel is still in jail, Wyldstyle is still bullying Lord Business, Morro lost his car keys, and-

Dr. Inferno: Can I do it?

Amset-Ra: Losers don't announce. Anyway, Eglor only announces the finals, and-

Bib Fortuna enters with Benny.

Bib Fortuna: You wanna wonga?

Amset-Ra: Hey, thanks for the announcer, Bib! Let's see what you've got!

Benny: SPACESHIP! Spaceship spaceship spaceship SPACESHIIIIIP!

Amset-Ra: That's the worst announcer I've ever seen. CORONA!

Benny: SAAAAAACESHIIIIIIIP-

Ding!

Frenzy: What about ME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Amset-Ra: Well, I don't know about-

Frenzy: I'll give you five hundred DOLLARS!!!!!!!!!!!!!! In CASH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Amset-Ra: Deal.

Frenzy: Welcome to Amset-Ra's Figting PYRAMID!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Today's match will take place in the RANCOR PIT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Leia:' Unhand me, you creep!

Jabba: Sap.

TC-17: I had no idea that you spoke exactly like the great Hypaxxus-5.

Frenzy: In the Rancor Pit is none other than the Rancor HIMSELF!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Rancor: RAWR!

Frenzy: Dropping into the Rancor Pit first is the master of lightning-

Jay: Me?

Frenzy: ELECTROLYZER!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Electrolyzer: Nyahahahahahahaha.. You zhall be reduzed to azhez onze I am finizhed with you!

Frenzy: Dropping into the Rancor Pit second is the master of stone, POHATU!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Pohatu: Golden Mask or none, I'll defeat you!

Frenzy: Dropping into the Rancor Pit third is the master of... of... Ah, just forget it, it's CRANIAC!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Craniac: I will win, because there is no Mace Windu to stop me.

Amset-Ra: Jabba and Bib Fortuna will be giving awards today.

Jabba: Bosa malakulu TheAnonymousA.

TheAnonymousA: I still won't be known!

Bib Fortuna: Bosa obetia Bansha.

Bansha: Vooooote meeeeeeee iiiiiiiiiin...

Frenzy: Before being dropped into the Rancor Pit, Oola and a Gamorrean Guard will give their PREDICTIONS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Oola: *gulp* R-r-rancor...

Gamorrean Guard: Squeal!

Oola: He said Pohatu.

Ka-chunk!

Oola and Gamorrean Guard: Aaaaaahhhhh...

...

...

Amset-Ra: Tee-Vee, start the match.

Tee-Vee: Boot rancor_sequence.exe.

Jabba's throne slides over the trap door, and a TV screen is put in front of him.

Pohatu: Protector! Protect me!

Pohatu's radio clicks to life.

Protector of Stone: I can't for three reasons: 1. Amset-Ra says no outsiders are allowed, 2. I'm afraid of the Rancor, and 3. I'm too busy fighting the Skull Spiders.

Pohatu: I see.

Electrolyzer: Nyahahahaha... Let'z zee how you like LIGHTNING!

ZAAAAAAAAAAAAP!

Pohatu: Ugh... short... circuiting...

Frenzy: Electrolyzer just shocked Pohatu really HARD!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Tee-Vee, is he ELIMINATED!!!!!!!!???????

Tee-Vee: Eliminated: Pohatu = False.

Frenzy: OH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Craniac: Eat some lasers, you big Rancor!

Rancor: RAWR!

SMASH!

Craniac: Are you able to crush bone that easily?

Frenzy: Those moves are SELF-EXPLANATORY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Amset-Ra: Announce them anyway.

Frenzy: FINE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Rancor just smashed CRANIAC!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Rancor: RAWR!

Electrolyzer: Hungry, boy? I hope Craniac will zuvvize!

''Toss! Gulp!''

Rancor: Burp!

Tee-Vee: Elimimated: Craniac.

Frenzy: Rancor just ate CRANIAC!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I need to consider buying him for my Cooking with a Crazy Crook RECIPES!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Electrolyzer: Now, Rancor, let'z give you a ztomachache, zhall we?

Pohatu: Groan...

Frenzy: Pohatu is STIRRING!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Pohatu: Protector! Protect me!

Protector of Stone: Remember my answer from earlier?

Pohatu: Well, let's just say that Amset-Ra repealed his rule, Rancor is eliminated, and you won your battle.

Protector of Stone: Deal.

The Protector of Stone falls through the trap door.

Rancor: RAWR!

Chomp!

Protector of Stone: HEY! My staff is not a chew toy!

Electrolyzer: I already gave him one; hiz name iz Craniac! Now, allow me to charge my lightning launcherz and-

Protector of Stone: Lightning!

''Zap! Dodge!''

Electrolyzer: GIVE ME ZOME TIME HERE!

Protector of Stone: NO.

Frenzy: Protector, where did you get your STAFF!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Protector of Stone: I got it at a buy one get one not-so-free sale at-

Amset-Ra: Let me guess... Brickmart?

Protector of Stone: How did you know?

Amset-Ra: People are always bringing up those running gags.

Pohatu: I thought they didn't have Brickmarts on Okoto.

Protector of Stone: I imported it from Heartlake City.

Electrolyzer: CONZTRUCT!

Clockclickclickclickclick!

Amset-Ra: What a surprise. It's his own vehicle.

Frenzy: I'm announcing HERE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Amset-Ra: I know.

Electrolyzer: PREPARE VOR IMMINENT DEZTRUCTION IN TEN!... NINE!... EIGHT!...

Pohatu: Boomerangs!

Prop!

Rancor: RRAAWWRR!!

Frenzy: As Electrolyzer begins his countdown to dropping his EMP bomb, Pohatu has propped Rancor's mouth OPEN!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Electrolyzer: ZEVEN!... ZIX!...

Protector of Stone: C'mon, staff... charge already...

Pohatu: Boomerang!

''Wooshwooshwoosh... CLONK!''

Rancor: RARGH!

Frenzy: A direct HIT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Electrolyzer: VIVE!... VOUR!...

Protector of Stone: Almost done...

Snap!

Pohatu: My boomerang!

Frenzy: Rancor snapped the boomerang like a BONE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Electrolyzer: THREE!...

Protector of Stone: ONE!...

Electrolyzer: TWO!...

Protector of Stone: TWO!...

Electrolyzer: ONE!...

Protector of Stone: THREE!...

ZAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAPP!

Frenzy: The light is too bright to see ANYTHING!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Oh wait, they're both ELIMINATED!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Tee-Vee: Referee job status: Stolen.

Pohatu: Eat boomerangs, Rancor!... Oh wait, I tried that and it didn't work... Aha!

Chopchopchopchopchopchop!

...

Tee-Vee: Winner = Pohatu.

Frenzy: Pohatu repeatly chopped Rancor with his boomerangs like an ONION!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Amset-Ra: CORONA!

BZZZZZZZZZZNNNNNNNNN...

Frenzy: Eeeeeennnnddd trraaaaannnnnsssmmmmiiiiiisssssssiiiioooooonnnnn!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!...

Ding!

Shortly before the transmission ends, Malakili starts crying, so Bib Fortuna throws him in the dungeon.

Amset-Ra: Well, our Tattooine vacation is already over.

Anubis Guard: Amset-Ra! Pharaoh Hotep accidentally broke the fourth wall!

Amset-Ra: And I don't even have insurance for that...

End Transmission.

See the Fighter Rankings as of this battle.

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