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This is indeed a battle. What came first: the battle or the fighters? Hmmmm...
Season 3, Round 1, Battle 5 (91st battle overall)
Written by NexoByte on March 17, 2016
The Announcer

The Referee

The Predictor

I'll give you three guesses...
The Red Corner
Still cruising since his introduction in both theme and battle in 2015!

Rank 1; 7-1
Nominated by Punctuation Penguin
The Green Corner
Clutch Powers
Clutch Powers
He's got the powers to clutch gold today!

Unranked; 0-2
Nominated by Punctuation Penguin
The Yellow Corner
Having finished with her toxic meltdown after her loss last season, she's ready to climb back on that horse.

Rank 3; 4-1
Nominated by Commandosaur
The Blue Corner
Totally Infearno. Shh...

Nominated by NexoByte

This is indeed a battle. What came first: the battle or the fighters? Hmmmm...

The Announcer: Tee-Vee

The Referee: Tee-Vee

The Predictor: I'll give you three guesses.

Before the Battle, or, I Dream of Nadakhan

Amset-Ra enters his office to see a magic lamp sitting on his desk.

Amset-Ra: Oh, for the love of bricks, I hope I'm not going to relive the Aladdin adventure...

He rubs the lamp and Nadakhan emerges.

Nadakhan: I be grantin' ye three wishes, landlubber! What'll it be, matey?

Amset-Ra: First, I wish for gold-

Nadakhan: Ye wish for mold? Okay! Wish granted!

Amset-Ra: I said gold, not mold. Next, I wish for-


Amset-Ra: No, I did not wish for eek.

Chef Eclair and Axl emerge from the café.

Chef Eclair: Is terrible! Ze bread, it has turned into mold! And no one like ze moldy loaf!

Amset-Ra: Shame on you, Nadakhan. Axl, Brawn, whoever you are, what are you doing back here?

Axl: I couldn't resist your café.

Amset-Ra: That's because it's enchanted. Now leave.

He and Chef Eclair leave.

Nadakhan: What do ye wish for next, matey?

Amset-Ra: I wish that Ogel would stay in prison forever.

Nadakhan: Wish granted!

Amset-Ra: And finally, I wish for-


Amset-Ra: What this time?

Olivia (from Friends) enters.

Olivia: I was soaking in your hot tub, when suddenly, this black helmeted metal creep appeared in the tub with me!

Nadakhan: What? Ye only asked that Ogel bathe with Olivia together!

Amset-Ra: I said no such thing! (turning to Olivia) CORONA!


Olivia: I'm calling the coooooooooooops...


Amset-Ra: My hot tub is strictly off limits. And Heartlake City doesn't have police.

Nadakhan: What be yer third wish?

Amset-Ra: I wish for two more wishes.

Poof! Poof!

??? 1: Double, double, toil and trouble!

??? 2: Right in the middle of an experiment, too!


Nadakhan: Sorry, I be a bit hard of hearing in one ear.

Amset-Ra: At least pay attention!

Nadakhan: I be a Djinn. It be my nature to twist wishes.

The Genie Girl appears and blinks.

Witch 1: Ow!

Witch 2: You're twisting my torso the wrong way!


The Genie Girl laughs and blinks herself away. The Genie appears.

Genie: Give me my lamp back.

Nadakhan wishes for gunpowder, shoves it down the lamp, and fires himself out of the lamp. He lands on a certain red planet where a certain hexapedal creature guards a certain spaceship. The Genie gets into the lamp.

Amset-Ra: Well, that was fun. Time for the battle!

The Battle

Tee-Vee: Boot greetings.exe.


Tee-Vee: Red Corner = Invizable.

Invizable: The king is back to rock your world!

Tee-Vee: Green Corner = Clutch Powers.

Clutch: With creativity on my side, and no Jek-14 to worry about, there's no way I can lose.

Amset-Ra: How can you win? You're up against three Ultra Agents villains. Two of them appeared in Ninjago. Oh, and Jek-14's appearing in the next battle.

Clutch: Yikes! He beat me once before. He's pre-voted, right?

Amset-Ra: Right.

Tee-Vee: Yellow Corner = Toxikita.

Toxikita: Is everyone afraid of a returning season runner-up?

Invizable: That's nothing. You'd best be afraid of a returning season champion.

Tee-Vee: Blue Corner = Infearno.

Infearno: TRY AND TOUCH ME!!!!!!!!

Frenzy: STOP MIMICKING ME!!!!!!!!!!

Amset-Ra: Yeah, Dr. Infearno.

Dr. Inferno: Did someone just call in an awesome mad scientist?

Amset-Ra: No, Toa Hordika.


Amset-Ra: Boy, that gets him good.

Tee-Vee: Minifigure of the Week = Anuba.

Anuba: Win like an Olympian runner who is without sluggishness!

Tee-Vee: Fighter of the Week = Mace Windu.

Amset-Ra: Sorry, Tee-Vee, but Palpy threw him out the window.

Li'ella: Ah saw him! He was hangin' on a little ol' clothesline in Coruscant!

Amset-Ra: Thanks.

Tee-Vee: User of the Week = ArcticSeahorse.

Amset-Ra: Presumably for becoming the next great battle writer.

ArcticSeahorse: And I'm looking forward to it!

Tee-Vee: Prediction = Invizable.

Amset-Ra: That contradicts BubbleBomber's prediction! Are you ill or somet-


Ghoultar: Hi! Welcome to the City of Stiix branch in Gell!

Amset-Ra: Sponsored by the Priest of the Tee-Vee, I suppose.

Ghoultar: How did you know?

Back at the pyramid...

Tee-Vee: Fight.

Ding ding ding!




Toxikita: Hey! That's my hair! Watch it!

Invizable: Missed me by a long shot. Better perfect your homing device, Infearno.

Infearno: I DON'T HAVE ONE!!!!!!!

Tee-Vee: Invizable: Visible = False. Infear-

Anuba: Outta my way! Watch a pro do it! Vizzie became invisible like an undercover spy, then avoided Infearno's flamethrower, the brunt of which fried Toxikita like a chicken!

Toxikita: Your analogies are getting rough, Toa A-n00b-a.

Clutch: Let's build something cool!

Infearno: COOL?!?!?!?! NOT ON MY WATCH!!!!!!!!!

Toss! KA-BOOM!!!

Clutch: O-kay... I admit that I didn't need that.

Anuba: Infearno threw dynamite at Clutch just as he was going to build something!

Invizable: Why don't we form an alliance against Clutch?

Infearno: AGREED!!!!!!!!

Toxikita: Fine.

Clutch: Perhape my wording was wrong. Let's instead build something awesome!


Clutch: Behold! My Galactic Titan!

Toxikita: Behold! My poison!

Pew! Pew!

Clutch: Seriously, Toxie? Now to unload my missiles onto you all!

Invizable: You have to activate split function first.

Clutch: D'oh!

Infearno: GOODBYE!!!!!!

Toss! Toss! KA-BOOM!!!!!

Clutch: That wasn't nice!

Anuba: Infearno blew up the Galactic Titan like a cereal box!

Clutch: ...

Toxikita: RETOX! Where's my chopper?

Retox: Here!

He tosses a knife to her.

Toxikita: No, Retox, my chop-

Retox tosses a set of false teeth to her.


Retox: OH!!

The helicopter crashes through the wall, but it can't because it hasn't been fueled.

Toxikita: ...

Infearno: I've had enough yelling for one day. While you argue, my dear Toxie, I'll finish Clutch!

Invizable: Not if I finish him first.

Infearno: I was never captured by the Agents, I should finish him!

Invizable: You're right... You were captured by the Ultra Agents.

Infearno: D'oh!

Invizable: Um... Where is Clutch, anyway?

Clutch: Right above you!

Infearno: NO! He's going to crush me with his-


Anuba: And Clutch's MicroFighter Star Destroyer saves the day like a superhero on steroids!

Toxikita: Goodbye, Infearno.


Anuba: Infearno is OUT!

Invizable: Hey! I thought we were a team!

Toxikita: Well, you know, I kinda lied-

Invizable: No one escapes the wrath of a season champion!

Toxikita: I may not be able to escape your wrath, but I can escape you yourself.

Invizable: D'oh!

Toxikita: I'm the only fighter here who hasn't said that yet.

Invizable: You will when I blast you.

Toxikita: D'oh!

Invizable: Aha!


Invizable: YEOW! How did you find me, Clutch?

Clutch: Using my Umbaran MHC's radar and my state-of-the-art weaponry.

Invizable: Oh. Well. That not much. I mean, that's not nearly enough to beat me!

Clutch: Back to the drawing board.

Invizable: And back to shooting you, Toxikita!

Toxikita: No!

Invizable: Defiant now, are we?


Invizable: Watch this! Oh wait, you can't. I'm invisible.


Anuba: And Invizable had just built- I can't quite see it.

Invizable: A Storm Lasher, stupid. You know, the one from Exo-Force?

Anuba: Oh.

Invizable: Come to papa...

Toxikita: Oh, I will...


Toxikita: YEEARGH!

Anuba: Toxikita is OUT! Invizable shot her with the Storm Lasher, that's all.

Invizable: And now, Clutch, I have you in my Clut- what is this?

Clutch: My latest Rube Brickberg contraption.

Invizable: I can't dodge this...

Tip! Clackclackclackclackclack SNAP! Sproinggggg tip CRASH!!!!!!

Anuba: Invizable! Where are you?


Anuba: Ring out! The winner is Clutch Powers!

Clutch: It was foolish of him to run out of the ring to dodge my trap which consisted of dominoes, a mouse trap, my MicroFighter Star Destroyer, and my Umbaran MHC.


Amset-Ra: What did I miss?

Clutch: I won!

Amset-Ra: Great!

Clutch: Invizable cheated.

Amset-Ra: Irony!

Clutch: And Infearno stopped sounding like Frenzy.

Amset-Ra: D'oh!


Priest of the Tee-Vee: Anuba! You dare to overthrow and replace the almighty, benevolent, cute, devilish, exquisite Tee-Vee?

Anuba: Cute? Devilish?

Priest of the Tee-Vee: D'oh!

After the Battle

At the Axle Bar...

Snake: Well, if it isn't the world-famous Nadakhan! What'll it be?

Nadakhan: I'll have a grilled cheese sandwich and a soda.

Snake: Okay!

Laval: Great outlands! Why is there a Phoban mothership parked outside?

Nadakhan: Beats me, matey.

Laval takes off his costume to reveal-

Alien Queen: It's MY mothership.

Nadakhan: Um... Very convincing disguise there, Queenie.

Snake: Here's your chilled grease sandwich and roadster.

Nadakhan: Thanks. I twisted the order to make it sound better.

Alien Queen: You twisted the soda to make it taste bitter?

Nadakhan: End transmission or whatever, matey!

End transmission or whatever, matey.

The Winner
Clutch Powers
Clutch Powers
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See the Fighter Rankings as of this battle.

How much did you enjoy Invizable vs. Clutch Powers vs. Toxikita vs. Infearno?

The poll was created at 21:22 on July 3, 2016, and so far 0 people voted.

Isn't he supposed to be in his corner box?

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